when one door closes

I’ve tried to start this process numerous times. When I was 19 or 20, I tried contacting Dillon Southwest, the adoption agency that placed me in the United States. I had received a list of documents to send back to them, and had spoken with my parents about beginning the search. I was a couple years into college and felt like I was finally at a place that I would be proud to show my biological parent. I had a great upbringing and had my first successes as an independent adult. Shortly after my inquiry Dillon announced that they would be closing the Southwest branch and consolidating into Dillon International. All the progress I had made had ceased, and I would have to restart with a new agent once the records had been transferred to the new location. This pretty much killed the search outright. My life was focused on school and work and my priorities shifted elsewhere. However, I kept saying the search was “in progress” and took my first few trips to Korea to go see the country firsthand.

Eventually I ended up enlisting in the Army, and it brought me to Korea a couple times. Every time I would visit I would try and learn more/do more to connect with this part of my identity. My friend’s parents told me about ESWS and how they’d help me find my mother, and a cab driver once pulled over to apologize about early-90’s adoption practices, and provide me resources to help reconnect me.d

A year ago I reached out to Dillon to finally sit down and get this process underway again. I had a new energy, and was immediately met with success. I had connected with a new team of people who were equally enthusiastic to help and they had helped me collect my documents and really think about this process, and what I wanted to get from it. There were questionnaires about different outcomes and how one might deal with the various responses to adoption searches. Dillon was very helpful in thinking through some of these complex situations. Unfortunately Dillon International also announced that they would be closing their post-adoption services department.

Eastern Children’s Welfare Society (Now known as Eastern Social Welfare Society) was the only option I had left. They were the reciprocal Korean adoption agency who helped place me, and as a last resort I sent them an inquiry email. I did not get a response from them.